Posts tagged cutting
Posts tagged cutting
But I keep putting on a smile and optimistic act. I mean, a part of me actually is optimistic, but most of me just doesn’t want to live anymore. I just want to end it. I don’t want to deal with this anymore.
Death seems so easy, but it’s so permanent.
It doesn’t change the fact that I really want it, and I keep getting ignored by the one person who I need not to ignore me.
Fuck it. I think it might be another cutting night, otherwise it would be a night to end all nights, and I can’t do that just yet.
I really just wish I would die. I’m too much of a puss to actually off myself, but still. I don’t wan to live how I am living right now.
Why are people so afraid of death?
The suffering ends there.
Guess I’ll just have to stick with cutting myself since it’s clear no one actually cares anymore. Well, at least not the people who I want/need to care.
Basics:
-Boyfriend dumped me recently, and I’m still trying to get over it.
-Had a relapse with cutting not too long ago. Might happen more often.
-Started taking my anti-depressants again.
-Been extremely depressed and prone to crying.
-Having awesome times with awesome people and feeling special.
-Going between hating life and loving life.
-Little sleep and not eating properly.
I’ll rant about certain things when I wouldn’t mind crying over them, but it’s late, and I want to fall asleep in a good mood.
